When you first start dating someone that you think could be the one you want to end up with forever, there are some huge mistakes that can derail that relationship. It can be easy to do all the right things when you don't care as much about what will happen next, but when that special one crosses your path, nerves and uncertainty can cause you to make some bad choices. These tips can help you make the most of your dating relationships when you feel it is important to make all the right moves. Dating seems tricky, but finding the right person is not missioned impossible, as it may seem.
No one have a magic formula to make dating relationships what they should be all of the time. Humans make mistakes, and those mistakes are bound to come up during a date here and there. Humans are as forgiving as they are prone to mistakes, so if you are with the right one, those mistakes are not going to be as big as they could be. However, there are some deal breakers in dating relationships that can really turn off the other person, leaving you wondering what happened.
One of the most debated things in dating relationships is when to make that first call after the first date. Now that we have texting, email, and social networking sites, the time to contact the person again is even more confusing in nature. If you call right after the date, the person may get scared off, even if they like you. If you wait too long, they may have already written you off as a game player. What can you do? Perhaps a short text right after the date about how much fun you had and then call the next night or the day after. This won't always be the best idea, but it is not bad. Read the person and then decide.
Moving in too fast, in other ways than with the phone call, can also scare someone off, even if they like you. Getting too close to fast is uncomfortable for many. Take it easy and slow, even if you are falling head over heels fast, and go by their cues. If you really listen to them or pay attention to their body language, you can tell when you can move faster or when they need some space. That 'can't get enough of you' phase will come soon enough if you take it easy and play it cool. Don't play games in dating relationships, but don't seem needy either so the person feels overwhelmed.
Lastly, don't make assumptions about your dating relationships. If you have not had 'the talk' yet, do not assume that the other is going to be okay with you dating others. On the other hand, don't assume that the relationship is exclusive if you have not talked about it. It can be tricky. Some treat all dating relationships as exclusive until they know if it is going to work out or not to avoid all problems. If you are dating around, make sure the other knows it so they can decide if they want to be involved or not. Otherwise, you could end up liking them a lot but they walk away because you were not honest with them.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Dating Tips in the Modern Age
Growing up, we grow used to a fairy tale ending. Boy (preferably a prince) meets girl (obviously a princess), they fall in love, and live happily ever after. Blame it on what you like, but that's not how dating goes these days. Whether it's from friends, family, or complete strangers, it seems as though there's an endless supply of dating tips out there. Here are some of the easiest to adopt dating tips that just might help you find that Mr. or Miss Right.
First off, be yourself. I know this sounds cheesy and easier said than done, but it's the cardinal rule of dating tips. Honesty is often considered the cornerstone of any good relationship, but being honest about which you are is the foundation beneath it. A friend of mine recently found herself in a position where she had nothing left to lose. She had an awful job, a ton of debt, and was considering moving home. She wasn't looking to meet anyone, but a guy she ran into on a regular basis asked her out for a drink. Because she had no reason to hide anything, and believing the date wasn't going to result in anything further, she was 100% frank about everything in her life. The result? The guy found her honesty refreshing, an insisted on continuing to see her. Honesty pays.
Searching to no avail? Stop looking. If you're anything like me, this may sound laughable at first, but looking for that special someone often limits our ability to find them. It's one of the hardest dating tips to follow, but it's important. This dating tip does make a lot of sense when you think about it, though. Remember the last time you couldn't find something as you were running out the door, but in the process of your search, you found everything you didn't need? We've all been there, and it's the same thing with love. If you're looking too hard, you may find yourself manufacturing qualities in others and spinning justifications because you WANT to find what you're looking for- not because you actually have. If you stop looking, you're more likely to be surprised, and take notice, when it shows up.
It may seem obvious, but have an open mind. This is one of those dating tips that go against every romantic comedy you've ever seen, but is realistic. The dating show Tough Love on MTV encounters women all the time that have a “checklist” of sorts- a list of qualities they're looking for in a man. Even the experts on the show hand out the same dating tip: ditch the list. So what if the guy on your list doesn't make six figures right now? That doesn't mean he won't in the future, and money really is NOT everything. The girl you're talking to isn't the DD fantasy you hand in mind? Too bad, because she could be the one woman who finally GETS your sense of humor. Stop setting strict expectations, and enjoy the moment. You might be surprised where it gets you.
First off, be yourself. I know this sounds cheesy and easier said than done, but it's the cardinal rule of dating tips. Honesty is often considered the cornerstone of any good relationship, but being honest about which you are is the foundation beneath it. A friend of mine recently found herself in a position where she had nothing left to lose. She had an awful job, a ton of debt, and was considering moving home. She wasn't looking to meet anyone, but a guy she ran into on a regular basis asked her out for a drink. Because she had no reason to hide anything, and believing the date wasn't going to result in anything further, she was 100% frank about everything in her life. The result? The guy found her honesty refreshing, an insisted on continuing to see her. Honesty pays.
Searching to no avail? Stop looking. If you're anything like me, this may sound laughable at first, but looking for that special someone often limits our ability to find them. It's one of the hardest dating tips to follow, but it's important. This dating tip does make a lot of sense when you think about it, though. Remember the last time you couldn't find something as you were running out the door, but in the process of your search, you found everything you didn't need? We've all been there, and it's the same thing with love. If you're looking too hard, you may find yourself manufacturing qualities in others and spinning justifications because you WANT to find what you're looking for- not because you actually have. If you stop looking, you're more likely to be surprised, and take notice, when it shows up.
It may seem obvious, but have an open mind. This is one of those dating tips that go against every romantic comedy you've ever seen, but is realistic. The dating show Tough Love on MTV encounters women all the time that have a “checklist” of sorts- a list of qualities they're looking for in a man. Even the experts on the show hand out the same dating tip: ditch the list. So what if the guy on your list doesn't make six figures right now? That doesn't mean he won't in the future, and money really is NOT everything. The girl you're talking to isn't the DD fantasy you hand in mind? Too bad, because she could be the one woman who finally GETS your sense of humor. Stop setting strict expectations, and enjoy the moment. You might be surprised where it gets you.
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